Sgt. Bob Cryer
Mr Neil Jones, affectionately known
as Sgt. Cryer amongst his peers, is a true 'elite', the 'cream of the crop'
he's risen to the top. The Sergeant is a main stay of the Lance Boil movement
and is one of the most committed to the cause. Indeed it has Bob's very face
upon which the dream of Lance Boil was born.
He has even begun hosting the annual LB does Jones' BBQ which has been a great success for two years running. He's well known in musical circles; in fact two popular songs have been penned in his honour. If I may quote just a small piece from each:
Charmless Man by Blur, written by Damon Albarn
Educated the St. Olave's (sic) way,
He knows his claret from his Beaujolais.
He would have liked to have been Ronnie Kray,
But then nature didn't make him that way.
Damon Albarn explains the thinking
behind the lyrics:
"Jonesy sums up everything that is bad about the grammar school system.
He's a real wannabe social climber; he can talk the talk, but not walk the walk
I'm afraid. There is something of a dreamer in him - which the romantics love,
he thinks he's 'a little bit ooh a little bit ah', but really he's a softie.
I recall a story about him on the inaugural LB does Newquay trip, when the original
Boilers were all sitting on Fist Thrall Bitch having Jazz Club when a ruckus
occurred amongst some rough looking northerners. Jonesy was the first to bail
- 'I don't want to sound like a girl, guys, but I think we should get out of
here.' The guy's a legend."
Mr. Jones by Counting Crows, words by Adam Durritz
Mr. Jones and me we tell each other
fairy tales
Stare at the beautiful women
"She's looking at you. Ah, no, no, she's looking at me"
Smiling at the bright lights
Coming through in stereo
When everybody loves you, you can never be lonely.
Adam Duritz explains the thinking
behind the lyrics:
"I was with Jonesy in a club in London, Ingerland, one Friday night chatting
about girls we'd been with, Alison Beard, May Dupp, Chinn Ee and so on, when
we saw some stunning girls over in the corner. Now, I was feeling a bit down
on my luck with ladies at this time, and Jonesy was trying to cheer me up. He
kept saying that one of them fancied me because she kept looking over. So I
went over to speak to her, but it turns out that she's only got eyes for my
mate. So Jonesy and this chick go off together, and I've not seen either of
them since."
It is thought a third song may be on its way, this time from the up-and-coming artist S. Tinkler. Rumour has it the song may be based around the inevitable 'tug-of-love' between two friends, a funny blonde girl and 3 litres of Vin de France.
Email Bob Cryer at neiljones@lanceboil.co.uk