Jobless Centre - Navigating Restart Interviews and Job Interviews
Some jobseekers view their giro as a kind of government grant. Amongst this group are musicians, artists and writers who like to remain "between jobs" and see unemployed life as a way of furthering their artistic careers.
A POP GROUP YESTERDAY
The fact that they`re not in official employment allows them the amount of time they need to hone those artistic skills. This is very much frowned upon by the benefits agency and should not be condoned.
For the benefit of those people, below are some quick tutorials for maintaining your doley lifestyle.
This is the time when after 6 months of claiming benefits you will be told to attend a so called "restart interview". You will be interrogated about what you have been doing and what you will do to find full time employment by an employment advisor.
If you aim to remain unemployed it`s vital you follow a few simple rules.
These can be very strenuous and tricky situations. It`s really a game of bluff so if you are a poker player this should not pose any serious threat. The trick is not to seem to keen on any of the suggestions the advisor will invariably make. On the other hand if you come across as uninterested and not really wanting a job then they could have cause to freeze your giro payments. A sobering thought.
It`s a tightrope and one which you will have to cross again and again, of course practice makes perfect. Be careful and under no circumstances say the NO word. You are absolutely in no way allowed to refuse any employment offered. Again if you do your giro may be stopped until an adjudication officer reviews the decision.
Some people find that after many years on the dole they are unable to secure a position simply because they lack interview technique. It is very important that this lack of skills is maintained as failure can often mean, God forbid, employment.
ALWAYS turn up late. This can be accomplished by staying out at a nightclub until closing time then going to a mates for an after hours drinking session
TRY to smell of alcohol. You may wish to actually carry a can of alcohol into the interview room (Special Brew is the type most commonly used) in order to enhance the effect of being an alcoholic thus unsuitable for the job
ALWAYS sit down without being asked as you enter the interview room
NEVER answer questions clearly. It is important not to give YES or NO answers as on occasion people have been known to answer YES to the right question so securing themselves the job. If possible, leave long silences before mumbling something which has nothing to do with the question
Ie Interviewer - "Why do you want this job ?"
You - "Have you got a fag cos you`s is makin me nervous?"
NEVER make eye contact or sit near the interviewer. Body language is read by interviewers to determine whether you are keen or not. If possible, pull your chair to the corner of the room furthest from your interviewer and fix your stare elsewhere, perhaps, to the can you are holding or the ceiling. If any attempt is made to get your attention crouch on the floor and tremble or in extreme cases evacuate your bowels
CHEW a piece of gum, regularly blowing giant bubbles and fidgit constantly
NEVER offer your hand if the interviewer tries to shake it at the end of the interview and ALWAYS walk out without saying goodbye
