Howard Morgan's - Direct
Suggestions! - Issue No. 7
Creating Obstacles and Red
Herrings
When I taught hypnotherapy, not that many years ago, I
had the pleasure of counting among our staff some pretty amazing people.
And among these "folks" a core of experts actually had a lot to do with
the direction the rest of my life was to take.
The Institute I eventually founded, actually began as
a club. A couple of us started meeting every other Monday night to discuss
what was possible with the mind. A few friends were invited and eventually
this evolved into a 'club' open to anybone who claimed to work with the
mind. Our group eventually counted among it's members 2 Psychologists,
a Doctor, a Zen Master, 2 Yoga Instructors, a Krishna devotee and 3 of
us Hypnotherapist types. We would toss out a concept (like, say, meditation)
or a generic topic (like dealing with Phobias) and give everybody 2 weeks
to research out what their particular venues taught on the subject. Our
meetings boiled down to a 10 minute or so "report" by each person followed
by an in depth, open discussion. We kept copious notes, and this become
the basis for a lot of the techniques we eventually taught at the Mind
Dynamix Institute.
A lot of the 'conclusions' we drew might be considered
safe and predictable. But a couple 'techniques' that we fine tuned into
very powerful working tools might ruffle more than a few traditional feathers.
And I guess it's because I get some kind of sadistic pleasure out of 'bucking
the system' that I thought I'd share a few of them with you this month.
The first technique is something we called 'Creating Obstacles'.
I'm not sure if you'd call this a technique as much as a general policy
or mindset, but whatever you'd call it, it was an extremely powerful way
of supporting a Hypnotic Practice. The basic concept of 'Creating Obstacles'
is to make it difficult for clients to achieve their goals. Yes, that's
exactly what I meant. If you can make it difficult for a client to attain
their goal, you may also greatly increase the chances of them eventually
attaining it.
I believe the concept originally came from our Zen master.
He explained to us a method he used to 'screen out' those who were ready
to make changes. Basically, he kept himself separated from his following
so that meeting with him actually became a goal in itself. By the time
you were actually granted an audience with him, it was generally agreed
that you were well on your way to becoming a leader in the movement. Basically,
without even saying a word, the message came out loud and clear that if
the master was willing to spend time with you, then you were about to suddenly
make incredible changes in your life. I can almost hear him laughing as
he explained that the reason he could boast a 100% success in showing 'dramatic
change' in any followers he counseled, was because he simply refused to
meet with anybody who wasn't already well on their way to getting there.
The meeting itself became a right of passage. And the fact that his time
wasn't diluted with ill fated meetings, allowed him the luxury of dedicating
more of his time and attention to those who could do the most with it.
At a practical level, we developed a series of ways to
'pre screen' clients to assure that our time was spent only with those
who were serious. Part of this pre- screening process involved raising
our fees. When everybody else in town was charging $50US an hour to do
Hypnotherapy (back in the 70s), my students were walking out of my office
offering their services at $75US an hour. Perhaps they didn't get quite
as many clients up front, but those that did show an interest, had obviously
decided to 'go with the best' rather than 'buy the cheapest'. By choosing
to pay the extra $25, they had already presupposed the ability of our therapists.
I remember actually having my students rehearse the answer they would give
to anybody that asked why they cost more. They were basically told to look
the person right in the eye and explain that they were interested in finding
people who were serious about wanting to change. "If you really want to
stop smoking" they'd explain, "then the extra $25 won't make a difference".
It wasn't long before clients started bragging to their friends that they
"went to the best", that they "were willing to pay a bit more to get quality".
And this mystique more than paid for itself with plenty of new clients.
In fact, we did a study, and found that by the end of a year, most of our
students found that more than half their clients had failed with some other
Hypnotherapist in town and had decided to come by and try their services
at a higher price. Let's face it, would you want the cheapest heart surgeon
in the hospital to work on you?
And this "pay for the best" image began when a prospect
made their first call. My students were told to explain that "if you're
shopping for price, I can tell you right now you probably want to look
somewhere else, because we are one of the more expensive centers around.
If you're looking for results, our track record is pretty impressive. Normally
our 'smoking package' involves two sessions done one week apart, and both
sessions will end up costing you a total of $150. If you can afford that,
I'd like to invite you to come in for a free screening session during which
we'll determine if hypnosis will work for you." What's he going to say?
"No, I don't think my health is worth an extra $25"? The free 20 minute
session is an easy way to get them in, and it fits in well with the overall
image you're looking to portray, and fits in nicely with the next "trick
of the trade". Sometimes the "Free Session was actually done as a "mini
seminar" where, say, 10 people trying to lose weight were all invited for
a Monday night demo.
Another 'trick' that helped create the feeling of inaccessibility,
was a hidden policy we asked therapists to take of forcing clients to wait
at least a week for appointments. Basically it worked like this. You would
come in to talk about, say, losing weight. A therapist would do the 20
minute "free consultation" with you during which he would sell you on the
great things that were going to happen to you once you started, but then
would tell you you'd have to wait till "the end of next week before we
could fit you in". If you wanted to set the date, you had to pay, in advance,
for your last session (weight loss was a three session process). This was
a non refundable deposit you made in order to hold your place in line.
Think of what now happened in the minds of this subject.
He's already made a commitment. He's already stated, with his pocketbook,
that he wants to make this happen, that he's looking forward to changing.
Now he's sent home to think about it for a week. What do you think is going
to happen? Is he going to spend the week condemning himself for spending
money? No way. Very much on the contrary, he's going to spend the week
in heightened anticipation. Every time he walks up to the lasagna at the
buffet, he's going to remind himself about how next week he's not going
to do this. Every morning when he gets up, and thinks about how hard it
is to do his exercises, he's going to start thinking about how next week
he's going to enjoy the workout. We would back up the subtle 'suggestions'
by giving them a pamphlet explaining the changes they could expect, and
telling them to watch for times when they did things they were going to
change next week. Heck, by the time the person walked into my office a
week later, I could almost ask them for a check and send them back home.
With that kind of 'build-up' you can't go wrong.
I even use this 'method' on my therapy tapes. Unlike most
tapes that simply jump right into the hypnotic sessions, I begin with a
talk about what's going to happen and how they need to react. I then do
a mini hypnotic session and tell them they are NOT GOING TO CHANGE ANYTHING
for a day. I tell them to spend a day being very aware of the changes they
need to make. Spend a day taking mental notes of the times you fall short.
After the 24 hour 'waiting period' they'll be ready to jump into the 'change
your life' portion of the CD. Letting them 'sweat' for a day gets them
ready to change when the moment is at hand.
Part of the persona we tried to create for our students
also involved an image of almost a psychic ability to do instant diagnosis.
No they didn't really do it, but my students were told to look for factors
that might keep therapy from being effective and use them as excuses to
turn away clients. That's right, send people home who walked in ready to
pay good money. That was a difficult one, but it did two things. It allowed
those who were serious to make whatever changes were needed to be able
to 'earn the right' to come back for therapy. It also cut down tremendously
on failure rates. Let's face it. If you know this person's attitude is
going to keep you from being able to hypnotize them, then accepting them
as clients is little better than robbing them at gunpoint.
I mentioned earlier about the 'Free Screening' session.
This was advertised not as a time to try and sell hypnosis. Instead, it
was made very clear in our brochure that 'not everybody can be hypnotized,
and among those that can, not all can benefit from Hypnotherapy. This session
is a time for a qualified hypnotherapist to determine if our services will
actually work for you'. The Free Screening session went something like
this:
The client walked in, wondering if she would actually
be able to stop smoking this time. The therapist would perform a sway test
and perhaps a balloon/book arm test (or any other prehypnotic convincers)
and determine that the client could, in fact, be hypnotized. Only on very
rare occasions did someone actually fail the convincers (for obvious reasons).
But then the therapist would start asking questions. The questions were
designed to put the client on the defensive. Without saying so, the environment
was turned to the point that the client felt they had to sell the therapist
on their 'worthiness' for therapy. Questions like, "why do you want to
change?" or "It this really your choice, or are you giving in to the pressure
of your husband?" forced clients to 'sell us' on the idea that they were
really ready to make it happen.
If the client seemed uninterested or uncommitted to changing,
the therapist was told to get up from his or her chair, walk to the door
and then say, in as sympathetic, understanding voice as possible (being
very careful not to become belittling), "Sally, I'd love to help you, and
the truth is, in the long run, hypnosis is probably your best bet for stopping
smoking, but I don't feel you're committed enough to changing. If I took
your money today, I'd just be stealing from you. Why don't you take a couple
weeks to think about why you want to stop smoking, and then, if you'd like
to schedule another free appointment, I'd welcome the chance to see if
you're ready to make it happen."
Believe me, you're going to separate the men (or women)
from the kids here. Those who might otherwise be straddling the fence,
but really do want to change, aren't going to let you get away with it.
I've had people offer me extra money, beg me to give them a chance, even
make commitments to 'cut back enough to prove they're serious' if I'll
let them schedule another meeting. The prideful and highly insecure (the
gang that won't really commit to changing anyway, because of fear of failure)
will probably leave in a huff. But that's okay. They would have been another
failure added to your reputation. By prescreening clients in this way,
you accept only the ones you know you can help, and you push the others,
hoping they decide to take the momentum and move in the right direction.
And those who eventually make it, will respect you for being straight with
them. They'll become your greatest advocates. They'll go all over town
telling others about how you actually refused to take their money until
they were ready to really make it. And you'll soon find a long line of
people preparing for their 'audition'.
One final, extremely powerful, way of 'Creating Obstacles'
is to force clients to fail. That's right, actually sabotage their progress.
No, it isn't as mean as it may sound. Basically, when you come across a
tough customer who just doesn't seem to make it happen, you offer to use
a technique "that'll make it happen for you", explaining, however, that
it is the "hard way to get there". For those willing to try anything, this
will be a welcomed escape from all the "quick fix" versions of therapy
they've tried over the years. Once the client agrees, you set a breaking
point at which they'll suddenly be able to win.
A person looking to lose weight may be told, hypnotically,
that "you're going to find that you can't lose weight. In fact, you're
going to discover that you're going to start overeating, and continue to
gain weight at a fairly rapid rate until you pass the 300 lb mark. Once
you weigh yourself at 300 lbs. You'll find that you will suddenly be empowered
to change. At that moment, you're going to discover the mental key to taking
control and you'll be able to lose weight the way you've always wanted
to."
Obviously this "set point" shouldn't be more than 15
lbs. away. Telling a 125 lb. woman that she's going to continue to grow
until she reaches 300 lbs. will definitely get you a result, but probably
not the one you're looking for. Smokers might be told that they are going
to go through a week of smoking twice the cigarettes they now smoke daily
(that's a very powerful, loaded, suggestion. Even a die hard smoker will
learn to hate cigarettes is forced to double up for a week). Stress clients
can be told they will become painfully aware of the times when stress controls
them, and feel completely powerless to make any changes for a week. Be
careful about pushing people with neurotic issues over the edge.
Now think about what happens in the minds of these people.
All the programming that has told them for years that they couldn't stop
smoking will now go crazy. This person will feel very much like a slave,
and most of the arguments he or she has been ignoring for all these years
will suddenly become real to them. They'll start to wonder if they're going
to die before the week is over, they're going to start feeling that cigarettes
are just getting in their way, they'll despise the addiction they now have
to cigarettes. In fact, most will spend the better part of the week hoping
they're not going to have to spend the rest of their lives paying twice
as much for cigarettes and pumping them into their mouths indiscriminately.
When they walk into your office a week later, they're going to be ready
to change. Trust me, it works like nothing else I know how to do.
The one thing you do want to be careful about here, is,
like I mentioned earlier, pushing someone over the edge. Be very careful
with this 'overdose' method of therapy. Obviously, telling a heroin addict
that he'll double his dosage would be disastrous. Telling a spouse beater
that he's going to hit his wife twice as hard or twice as much might help
him change his mind about abuse, but would certainly not be a wise move
in the bigger picture. If you're very careful as you orchestrate your 'set
point' therapy, you're going to be amazed at how powerful it is.
Creating Red Herrings. It almost sounds sinister, doesn't
it? Basically, this relatively simple technique creates an air of mastery
in the minds of your client. When two people talk, there's always a series
of subtle, almost subconscious 'signals' each party listens for. In a client/therapist
relationship, this signal is pretty simple to predict. The client is busy
trying to figure out if the therapist can actually make this work. She's
busy looking for subtle hints that tell her he's not as competent as he's
putting on. She's intently focused on 'bits of wisdom' that show his competence.
Well, give them to her. No, don't sit there talking theory all through
your session, but instead, create the impression that you know so much
more than she does, that you can read things into her actions she doesn't
begin to understand. React to a made up set of rules that convince her
you know what you're doing.
How's that done? Well, it's done by rehearsing certain
reactions and suggestive questions. Imagine you're sitting in front of
me, explaining why you want to lose weight. You tell me you've been overweight
all your life, and you feel you can't make it. Suddenly, out of nowhere,
I look at you and smile for no reason. What happens? In your mind, you
assume I just heard something I was looking for. Suddenly you start trying
to think back and remember what you said that might cause me to smile.
If the timing was right, you're going to find nothing you've recently said
deserves the 'look of understanding' you're getting. You might even ask
why I'm smiling, and in keeping with my Red Hearing technique I explain
illusively, "Oh it doesn't really matter, but tell me, how many times have
you tried to lose weight on your own?" The honest truth is, it really doesn't
matter. Nothing you said meant anything to me. Nothing that's just happened
justifies my smile. But the fact that you think I know something you don't,
gives me a very powerful therapeutic leverage. You're now going to focus
more intently on what you're saying and my responses. You're also going
to believe that somehow, in my years of experience, I've managed to develop
a level of sensitivity that's almost Psychic. Powerful place to come from,
isn't it?
Another way to use the Red Herring technique is to ask
pointless questions. Don't line them up incessantly, but occasionally ask
questions that seem to tell you something only a highly competent therapist
could discern. As you tell me about the time you managed to stop smoking
for 6 months on your own, I suddenly ask, for no apparent reason, "What
did your mother do for a living?". When you answer, regardless of what
your answer is, I raise my eyebrows knowingly and smile. Guess what happens?
Suddenly the client tries to figure out what their mother's profession
has to do with you stopping smoking. Not understanding, they assume you
must be far more wise, far more sensitive than they are. They'll soon stop
trying to figure you out and start accepting you as an undisputed authority.
Sounds crazy, but it works wonders.
Finally a couple of techniques I'll finish with is the
'Compounded Suggestion' and the 'Predetermined Conclusion' techniques.
The Compounded Suggestion technique is a group of suggestions
told at the same time. Even in a non hypnotic state a person is far more
likely to obey suggestions they don't have time to understand. I use this
technique on stage regularly to take a difficult subject and suddenly convert
them into great performers. I use this technique incessantly in therapy
setting to establish my ability to 'make your mind do what I tell it to'.
If I were to ask you to stand and bark like a dog, chances
are you wouldn't. You'd have plenty of time to consider the ramifications
and probably not do it. Suppose, instead, that I ask you to "Stand up,
scratch your head, and bark like a dog." You'll be so busy trying to remember
the sequence and list that you won't have time to think through each suggestion
individually. In a therapy setting I might tell a smoker, before ever hypnotizing
them, that "I want to take a deep breath, put your hands on your head,
close your eyes and think of the 5 main reasons you know you'll never smoke
again." Imagine me telling a client that I want him to tell me why he's
never going to smoke again. It would never happen. Long before they opened
their mouth, they would have already caught the suggestion and immediately
become defensive. "Who says I'll never smoke again?" their inner mind will
start yelling, "You're being mighty bold to be so confident you can pull
this off." In fact, making a blatant statement like that will almost surely
be more harmful than good. When it's Compounded with the other suggestions,
the subject will be well into working on reasons before they'll even begin
to think something is wrong. I also use this technique a lot while subjects
are hypnotized. Instead of statements like "You're going to stop smoking",
which would cause defensive reactions, I might say, "You feel so good,
so in control, so free of the cigarettes, that once used to ruin your life."
They'll accept that suggestion even if they aren't hypnotized. Don't underestimate
the power of a Compounded Suggestion. If you need proof, try telling
your kids to "Do me a favor. Turn off the television, pass me that book
and take out the trash." You're going to be pleasantly surpised.
A 'Predetermined Conclusion' is just that, taking something
for granted. Statements like, "Because you now are able to lose weight,
you feel so free, so in control". The fact that I believe we've now "reached
that magic spot" makes the client accept this as a reality as well, a reality
that means the therapy has already worked. A conclusion that embeds a powerful
conclusion in the minds of my subjects. I use this technique regularly
in negotiating and even in asking for favors. Instead of asking you if
you think you might come by my house and help me move, I might make a statement
like, "Bob, I need your help moving on Saturday, and afterwards I'll buy
you dinner." Again, I assumed you would say yes and went on and quickly
changed the subject (in your mind) by making you wonder what's for dinner.
Try it, it works wonders as well.
I realize these techniques may seem unorthodox and way
off the beaten track, but then, most of the 'normal' therapy has become
useless precisely because clients are 'wise' to our ways. Isn't it about
time we pulled a few extra tools out of our bag of tricks?

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