20 things you never knew about the Liberator


Twenty things you never knew about the Liberator

The fastest ship in the Galaxy, and the most awkward sod in the world to light properly!

Standard by 12 in a 30 mph zone.
Planetary orbit - put it in Park mode.
This is Major Tom to ground control...
She flies...
She spies...
She death-defies...

Herculanium hull., Advanced space flight options, only one previous owner (a nun who only used it for getting to church on Sundays) the Liberator was the bargain of the century when Blake, ahem, found it abandoned in space. But what do we really know about this three pronged high speed kitchen-utensil-of-the-future-style spacecraft? For your edification and delight Callyfornia proudly presents

Those twenty Liberator facts in full...

"Mirror, signal, whatever..."
1. There are no duvets on board (Sarcophagus)
2. There are no light switches anywhere, and Orac is the only one who knows where the dimmer switch is (Shadow)
3. The ship has a well stocked drinks cabinet, but it's full of 'Christmas' booze - Midori, Jaegermeister, Bols etc, (Death-Watch)
4. And a wide selection of Christmas board games (Dawn of the Gods)

"Whoo-hoo, half pike!"
5. You have to stand up to reach any of the switches at your flight position (The Harvest of Kairos)
6. Orac has his own hostess trolley (Sarcophagus)
7. All Liberator controls - comms, weapons, navigation etc - can be accessed by pressing the one working button on the contol panel by the couch (Various episodes)
8. Liberator can achieve planetary orbit by sitting very, very still in space (Terminal)

"Are we nearly there yet?!"
9. Though the crew are only allowed one gun each (Space Fall) it doesn't matter which one (Sarcophagus)
10. There is an inexhaustible supply of teleport bracelets on board (various episodes)
11. Liberator isn't very good at flying in a curve and has to turn round when it's stationary before going in a new direction (Breakdown)
12. Even at Standard by 12 Liberator looks like it's moving very, very slowly (Star One)

Jam on the M25 - "looks like strawberry..."
13. There is only one window on board (Bounty)
14. There is an audio log book, but only Blake can be bothered to use it (Deliverance)
15. Liberator has an advanced psychic defence system (Space Fall, Dawn of the Gods) that nobody can be bothered to turn on any more
16. Although Zen has the ability to read minds (Space Fall) he delegates being taken over by psychic aliens to Cally

Those BBC SFX in full
17. Only one of the Neutron Blasters works (Shadow)
18. Although you can teleport to and from anywhere you still have to walk to the teleport bay (various episodes)
19. Although on Liberator you can get the rear viewer on the forward viewer (Dawn of the Gods) and the forward viewer on the auxiliary viewer (Breakdown) in the future everyone's telly is in black and white (Children of Auron, Warlord)
20. There's only one walkman on the Liberator, and it's Cally's (Please e-mail me the episode, I can't remember!)

Death of the Liberator: basically Avon goes potty and flies it through a galactic lava lamp. Tiny particles of bubbling poster paint adhere to the hull and cause bogeys to appear throughout the inside. Finally, with Servalan not noticing she is now in possession of a giant runny nose, the ship turns into plaster of paris and crumbles like so much cigarette ash in the breeze. Not a fantastic ending, but it was Season Three...

"Rust on the sills, only one  wiper working..."
"...treads are less than the legal minimum, hazard lights faulty..."
"...basically we'll have to slip 'em a tenner to get her past the MOT Avon"
Going...
Going...
Gone!


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