Things Kids Say

Things Kids Say


The kindergarten teacher was showing her class an encyclopedia page picturing several national flags. She pointed to the American flag and asked, "What flag is this?"

A little girl called out, "That's the flag of our country."

"Very good," the teacher said. "And what is the name of our country?"

'Tis of thee," the girl said confidently.


Two little boys were visiting their grandfather, and he took them to a restaurant for lunch. They couldn't make up their minds about what they wanted to eat. Finally the grandfather grinned at the server and said,

"Just bring them bread and water." One of the little boys looked up and quavered,

"Can I have ketchup on it?"


A new neighbour asked the little girl next door if she had any brothers and sisters.

She replied, "No, I'm the lonely child."


A mother was telling her little girl what her own childhood was like:

"We used to skate outside on a pond. I had a swing made from a tyre it hung from a tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We picked wild raspberries in the woods."

The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this in.

At last she said, "I sure wish I'd gotten to know you sooner!"


After putting her children to bed, a mother changed into old slacks and a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair. As she heard the children getting more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin.

At last she threw a towel around her head and stormed into their room, putting them back to bed with stern warnings.

As she left the room, she heard her three-year-old say with a trembling voice,

"Who was that?"


A boy was visiting his Grandma one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know how you and God are alike?"

I mentally polished my halo while I asked,

"No, how are we alike?"

"You're both old," he replied.


A little girl was diligently pounding away on her father's word processor. She told him she was writing a story.

"What's it about?" he asked.

"I don't know," she replied. "I can't read."


I didn't know if my granddaughter had learned her colours yet, so I decided to test her. I would point out something and ask what color it was. She would tell me, and always she was correct. But it was fun for Me, so I continued.

At last she headed for the door, saying sagely,"Grandma, I think you should try to figure out some of these yourself!"


A Sunday school class was studying the Ten Commandments. They were ready to discuss the last one.

The teacher asked if anyone could tell her what it was.

Susie raised her hand, stood tall, and quoted, "Thou shall not take the covers off thy neighbour's wife."


Back to Top